Are you ready to embark on a laughter journey that would make even a bare-faced man grow a mustache?
Well, brace yourself, as you’re about to dive into a sea of hilarious mustache jokes & puns that will not just tickle your funny bone, but could inspire your next eccentric facial hair style.
These quips aren’t just about hair on the upper lip, they’re about creating waves of laughter that are guaranteed to leave a smile behind, possibly even hidden beneath a mustache!
107 Mustache Jokes & Puns
1. Why couldn’t the mustache find a date? Because it was too hairy.
2. What do you call a mustache that doesn’t work? Unemployed.
3. Why couldn’t the mustache get a job? It didn’t have the right qualifications.
4. Why couldn’t the mustache cross the road? It didn’t have the guts.
5. What do you call a mustache that can’t swim? A mustache.
6. Why couldn’t the mustache get into the club? It didn’t meet the grooming standards.
7. What do you call a mustache that keeps disappearing? A mustache of illusion.
8. Why couldn’t the mustache tell a joke? It didn’t have the delivery.
9. What do you call a mustache that’s always late? Tardy.
10. Why couldn’t the mustache ride the roller coaster? It was too high maintenance.
11. What do you call a mustache that’s always angry? A hothead.
12. Why couldn’t the mustache play basketball? It lacked the facial hair.
13. What do you call a mustache that’s always sad? A frown.
14. Why couldn’t the mustache play the guitar? It lacked the fingers.
15. What do you call a mustache that’s always hungry? A moustachio.
16. Why couldn’t the mustache play poker? It had a terrible poker face.
17. Why couldn’t the mustache ride a bike? It lacked the pedal-stache.
18. What do you call a mustache that’s always grumpy? A frownstache.
19. Why couldn’t the mustache play baseball? It lacked the batting stache.
20. Why couldn’t the mustache play the piano? It lacked the fingernails.
21. What do you call a mustache that’s always lonely? A lonestache.
22. Why couldn’t the mustache play the violin? It lacked the bow stache.
23. Why couldn’t the mustache play hockey? It lacked the facial hair.
24. What do you call a mustache that’s always sneaky? A sneakstache.
25. Why couldn’t the mustache play soccer? It lacked the footstache.
26. What do you call a mustache that’s always silly? A goofstache.
27. Why couldn’t the mustache play golf? It lacked the club stache.
28. What do you call a mustache that’s always grating? An irritatingstache.
29. Why couldn’t the mustache play tennis? It lacked the racket stache.
30. What do you call a mustache that’s always nosy? A busybodystache.
31. Why couldn’t the mustache play the drums? It lacked the drumstache.
32. What do you call a mustache that’s always bossy? A controlstache.
33. Why couldn’t the mustache play the flute? It lacked the lip stache.
34. What do you call a mustache that’s always rude? A crudestache.
35. Why did the mustache apply for a job? It wanted to make ends “meat”!
36. What do you call a mustache that takes a lot of selfies? A snap-stache!
37. How does a mustache greet its friends? With a “whiskerful” hello!
38. Why did the mustache bring a ladder to the party? It wanted to “raise” the roof!
39. What’s a mustache’s favorite game? “Stache and Seek”!
40. What do you call a mustache that’s a terrible dancer? A “stumble-lip”!
41. How does a mustache get around town? It “hairs” a taxi!
42. Why did the mustache become a doctor? It wanted to “mustach-eck” your health!
43. What’s a mustache’s favorite superhero? “Hair-o”!
44. How does a mustache stay organized? It uses a “whiskerlist”!
45. What’s a mustache’s favorite fruit? A “peach-fuzz”!
46. Why did the mustache join a band? It wanted to play the “lip” sync!
47. What do you call a mustache with a great sense of style? A “fashion fuzz”!
48. How does a mustache like its coffee? “Stirred” with a dash of frothy upper lip!
49. Why did the mustache go to the art gallery? It wanted to brush up on its “whiskerpieces”!
50. How does a mustache express excitement? It “trembles” with joy!
51. Why did the mustache go to the amusement park? It wanted to ride the “mustache-coaster”!
52. What’s a mustache’s favorite movie genre? “Hair-ifying” thrillers!
53. How does a mustache order dessert? It says, “I mustache you for some cake!”
54. What do you call a mustache that loves to read? A “literary lip”!
55. Why did the mustache start a garden? It wanted to grow some “lip-berries”!
56. How does a mustache stay calm? It takes deep “whisker” breaths!
57. What’s a mustache’s favorite exercise? “Stache-ups” and “lip-ups”!
58. How does a mustache solve a problem? It “combs” through the options!
59. What do you call a mustache that tells jokes? A “whisker-wit”!
60. Why did the mustache take a cooking class? It wanted to learn to “whipstache”!
61. What’s a mustache’s favorite music? “Whisker” you like it or not!
62. How does a mustache stay in shape? It does “lip-o-lates”!
63. Why did the mustache visit the library? It wanted to check out some “lip-reading” books!
64. What do you call a mustache that loves to travel? A “whisker” wanderer!
65. How does a mustache celebrate its birthday? With a “stache-tacular” party!
66. Why did the mustache become a detective? It wanted to “investi-gate” mustache mysteries!
67. What’s a mustache’s favorite dessert? “Whip-stache” ice cream!
68. How does a mustache express affection? It gives a “whisker” of love!
69. What do you call a mustache that’s always cold? A “shiver-lip”!
70. Why did the mustache go to the comedy club? It wanted to “split its whiskers” laughing!
71. How does a mustache make decisions? It “goes with the flow” of its bristles!
72. What’s a mustache’s favorite type of dog? A “beard-ed” collie!
73. Why did the mustache become a detective? It loved playing “snoop-stache”!
74. What do you call a mustache that’s scared of heights? A “verti-stache”!
75. How does a mustache get ready for a date? It “primp-staches” in the mirror!
76. Why did the mustache start a YouTube channel? It wanted to be a “whisker” influencer!
77. What’s a mustache’s favorite type of music? “Whisker-delic” rock!
78. How does a mustache exercise its brain? It solves “lip-ograms”!
79. Why did the mustache go to the beach? It wanted to catch some “lip-rays”!
80. What do you call a mustache that can play multiple instruments? A “multi-tache-d” musician!
81. How does a mustache celebrate Halloween? It puts on a “boos-tache”!
82. Why did the mustache become an astronaut? It wanted to explore the “whiskerse”!
83. What’s a mustache’s favorite social media platform? “In-stache-gram”!
84. How does a mustache stay cool in the summer? It uses a tiny “lip-brella”!
85. Why did the mustache start a bakery? It wanted to make “pastry-lip” treats!
86. What do you call a mustache that’s always telling jokes? A “whisker-y” comedian!
87. How does a mustache express surprise? It “raises” its upper lip!
88. Why did the mustache become a teacher? It wanted to give “whisker” knowledge!
89. What’s a mustache’s favorite board game? “Lip-opoly”!
90. How does a mustache navigate through a maze? It follows its “whisker” instincts!
91. Why did the mustache join a band? It had a “hairy” good sense of rhythm!
92. What do you call a mustache that’s afraid of the dark? A “shiver-whisker”!
93. How does a mustache make decisions? It trusts its “whisker” instincts!
94. Why did the mustache become a weatherman? It loved forecasting “whisker” conditions!
95. What’s a mustache’s favorite holiday? “Lip-mas”!
96. How does a mustache tell time? It checks its “lip-clock”!
97. Why did the mustache go to the gym? It wanted to get “stache-toned”!
98. What do you call a mustache that’s a good listener? An “attentive whisker”!
99. How does a mustache keep its cool in a stressful situation? It “whiskers” it off!
100. Why did the mustache become a detective? It wanted to “stache” the culprits!
101. What’s a mustache’s favorite book genre? “Whisker-novels”!
102. How does a mustache cheer for its favorite sports team? It “root-staches” them on!
103. Why did the mustache join a circus? It loved walking the “tightwhisker”!
104. What do you call a mustache that loves to dance? A “twirly-whisker”!
105. How does a mustache stay confident? It embraces its “upper lip” strength!
106. Why did the mustache become a scientist? It loved “experimentache-ion”!
107. What’s a mustache’s favorite dance move? “The Lip-hop”!
Well, dear reader, we’ve combed through our list of mustache jokes, and we hope your spirits have been lifted higher than Salvador Dali’s mustache ends.
Remember, laughter is the best medicine, and with your mustache, it could also be the best disguise! Keep spreading the joy, and who knows?
Maybe the world will become a whisker funnier with every chuckle! Until next time, keep your humor bristling and your mustache twirling!
