Avocados might be the world’s most versatile fruit, but did you know they’re also the kings of comedy?
Prepare to split your sides as we dive into a guac-tastic collection of avocado jokes that will leave you in stitches!
103 Hilarious Avocado Jokes & Puns
1. Why couldn’t the avocado leave the party? Because it had a pit!
2. What do you call an avocado that tells bad jokes? A corny guacamole!
3. Why couldn’t the avocado make any friends? Because it was a little fruit-y!
4. What do you call an avocado that likes to party? A raveocado!
5. What do you call an avocado that likes to dance? A groovy guacamole!
6. Why couldn’t the avocado find its shoes? Because it had lost its pit-pairs!
7. What do you call an avocado that likes to travel? An adventurous guacamole!
8. What do you call an avocado that likes to read? A booka-moldy!
9. Why couldn’t the avocado make up its mind? It was in two pits!
10. What do you call an avocado that likes to exercise? A fit-a-moldy!
11. Why couldn’t the avocado play basketball? Because it had no game!
12. What do you call an avocado that likes to sing? A rocka-moldy!
13. Why couldn’t the avocado make any decisions? It was in a pit of despair!
14. What do you call an avocado that likes to swim? An aquatica-moldy!
15. Why couldn’t the avocado find its keys? Because it had misplaced its pit-keys!
16. What do you call an avocado that likes to play golf? A fore-ca-moldy!
17. Why couldn’t the avocado make any friends at school? Because it was a little green behind the pits!
18. What do you call an avocado that likes to cook? A chef-a-moldy!
19. Why couldn’t the avocado find its homework? Because it had lost its pit-per!
20. What do you call an avocado that likes to garden? A green-thumb-a-moldy!
21. Why couldn’t the avocado make any money? Because it had no job pit-spects!
22. What do you call an avocado that likes to paint? An artist-a-moldy!
23. Why couldn’t the avocado find its way home? Because it was lost off the pit path!
24. What do you call an avocado that likes to play video games? A gamer-guacamole!
25. Why couldn’t the avocado find its glasses? Because it had misplaced its pit-pairs!
26. What do you call an avocado that likes to hike? A mountain climber-guacamole!
27. Why couldn’t the avocado find its way out of the maze? Because it was stuck in the pit center!
28. What do you call an avocado that likes to play chess? A chess-master-guacamole!
29. Why couldn’t the avocado find its way out of the forest? Because it was lost off the pit path!
30. What do you call an avocado with a great sense of humor? An “avo-lol-o”!
31. Why did the avocado go to school? To learn how to guac and roll!
32. How do avocados apologize? They say, “I’m sorry-guac”!
33. Why are avocados such good listeners? Because they’re always all ears-a-cado!
34. What’s an avocado’s favorite sport? Pit-cherball!
35. How did the avocado propose to its partner? It said, “You’re the only guac for me!”
36. What do you call an avocado that’s an excellent dancer? A smooth-mover!
37. Why did the avocado blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
38. What did the avocado say when it won the lottery? “Holy guacamole, I’m rich!”
39. Why did the avocado get into a fight? Because it had a chip on its shoulder!
40. What’s an avocado’s favorite type of music? Guac and roll!
41. How did the avocado get out of trouble? It lawyered up with the best guac-counsel!
42. Why did the avocado break up with its partner? It couldn’t find its missing half!
43. What do you call an avocado in a magician’s hat? An avo-card-o!
44. Why did the avocado join a band? To play the guac-tar!
45. How do avocados make decisions? They “avo-ca-dice” it!
46. Why did the avocado go to the casino? To try its luck at guac-jack!
47. What do you get when you cross an avocado with a dinosaur? Guac-asaurus Rex!
48. How do avocados relax after a long day? They take a nice bubble bath-a-cado!
49. Why did the avocado refuse to fight? It was too much of a “peel”-y coward!
50. What did one avocado say to the other during a disagreement? “Lettuce guac and compromise!”
51. How do avocados stay in shape? They do “guac-arobics”!
52. Why did the avocado go to the comedy show? To see the best stand-up “avo-cedians”!
53. What did the avocado say to the tomato? “You’re my better half!”
54. Why did the avocado refuse to become an actor? It didn’t want to be in the limelight!
55. How did the avocado find its soulmate? It put up a sign saying “Seeking a perfect guac-mate”!
56. What’s an avocado’s favorite holiday? Cinco de Guaco!
57. Why did the avocado go to space? To explore the outer guac-laxy!
58. What did the avocado say when it was amazed? “Guac my world!”
59. Why did the avocado become a detective? To solve the mystery of the missing chips!
60. What do you call an avocado with magical powers? A sorcer-avo!
61. How do avocados communicate secretly? They use “guac-codes”!
62. Why did the avocado win the marathon? It had a lot of en-durian-ce!
63. What do you call an avocado with a crown? An “avo-cado”!
64. How do avocados stay positive? They always look on the bright “green” side!
65. What did the avocado say to the orange? “You’re a-peeling!”
66. Why was the avocado always so calm? Because it knew how to “avo-calm”!
67. How did the avocado become an artist? It had a great “avo-craft”!
68. What’s an avocado’s favorite TV show? “The Avo-dashians”!
69. How do avocados stay humble? They know the importance of being “down-to-guac”!
70. Why did the avocado go to the gym? To work on its “avo-cardio”!
71. What did the avocado say during karaoke night? “I’m ripe for the spotlight!”
72. What’s an avocado’s favorite superhero? The “Avo-cado Avenger”!
73. Why did the avocado become a detective? To solve the case of the missing toast!
74. How do avocados stay organized? They make sure everything is “avo-categorized”!
75. What do you call an avocado with an attitude? An “avo-cadon’t”!
76. Why did the avocado win the spelling bee? Because it knew how to “avo-correct”!
77. How do avocados express their emotions? They wear their “guac-heart” on their sleeve!
78. What’s an avocado’s favorite horror movie? “Guaczilla”!
79. Why did the avocado become a teacher? To spread the wisdom of “avo-cation”!
80. What did the avocado say to the cucumber? “You’re one cool cu-cado!”
81. How do avocados make decisions? They “avo-ca-ponder” them!
82. What do you call an avocado that’s good at math? An “avo-calcu-later”!
83. What did the avocado say when it bumped into the tomato? “Sorry, I didn’t mean to guac you!”
84. How do avocados send messages? They “avo-cate” them!
85. What’s an avocado’s favorite book genre? “Mystery and Guac-suspense”!
86. Why did the avocado become a lifeguard? To keep an “avo-eye” on everyone!
87. What do you call an avocado that’s always late? An “avo-car-dough”!
88. How do avocados solve problems? They “avo-cate” for a solution!
89. What did the avocado say to the refrigerator? “Close the door, I’m dressing!”
90. Why did the avocado become a pilot? It wanted to soar “avo-cation”!
91. How do avocados express their gratitude? They say, “Thank you-guac!”
92. What’s an avocado’s favorite dance move? The “guac and wiggle”!
93. Why did the avocado go to the beach? To catch some “ray-cado”s!
94. How do avocados make decisions? They “avo-ca-dice” it!
95. What’s an avocado’s favorite board game? “Guacopoly”!
96. Why did the avocado get a job as a tour guide? It knew all the best “avo-cations”!
97. What do you call an avocado who loves to party? An “avo-carnival”!
98. How did the avocado become a painter? It had a knack for “avo-crylics”!
99. Why did the avocado get a ticket? It was caught “avo-speeding”!
100. What’s an avocado’s favorite fruit? An “avo-card-o”!
101. How do avocados send love letters? They “avo-cado” them!
102. Why did the avocado start a band? It wanted to “guac the world” with its music!
103. What do you call an avocado that’s good at telling jokes? An “avo-comedian”!
Before we ‘avo’ you go, remember to share these avocado jokes with your friends – after all, laughter is the best spread!
Keep the good times rolling and let’s toast to the mighty avocado and its ‘pit’-s of humor!
See you next time, guacamigos!
